Today, I wanted to go to church, and I didn’t want to go to church. It’s an hour drive one way. I work every day of the week, and Sunday is the only day I can sleep in, so I got up late and cooked a brunch for my sons.
Then I cooked some soup and did laundry. I debated about driving to church. I really wanted to stay in my pajamas and not wash my hair today. But at the last minute, I decided to go to church. Sometimes, I resist the things I need the most.
Things are not smooth sailing in my life right now because I recently found out a close family member has cancer, yet today, I felt well rested. I felt like I was handling things okay today and maybe I didn’t need church.
I pray every morning, but sometimes, I need more to fortify myself. I realized that I was starting to view church like I view exercise. I can’t do a physical or spiritual practice once and think I’ll be strong. I need to keep practicing to stay strong.
Surrounding myself with people who care about being good and loving and helping others is so nourishing for me. I am not trying to promote any particular religion, but it’s immensely helpful to me to be around people who are on a spiritual path.
I ain’t perfect by any means. I swear, and I drink wine with my friends. But I believe in God, and I care about helping others.
My point with this is that I hope maybe you think about what you are resisting. Are you resisting anything that is actually helpful to you? If so, why?
Sometimes, I resist doing yoga. I love yoga, but there are times when I put my body in poses and my mind starts to quiet down & shit starts to rise to the surface of my consciousness. Shit that I buried by staying busy and distracted, but it’s good for me to face what I need to face. Yoga makes me stronger physically, emotionally & spiritually.
If there is anything you are resisting, I hope you see what it is and let yourself relax in that place. I hope you find things that nourish you and that you soften to those things enough to let them inside your life to fortify you, to strengthen you, to love you.
I hope my blog inspires you to believe in yourself more and feel less alone in the world. I, for one, am inspired by the imperfections of others who continue to rise up again and again despite life's challenges. May we find ways to inspire and support each other.